Romance scams are becoming an increasingly damaging form of fraud in Ireland, both financially and emotionally. According to figures from An Garda Síochána, more than €7 million has been lost to romance scams over the past five years alone. Behind that headline figure are thousands of individual stories, with the average victim losing approximately €28,500.
Gardaí have recently shared real-life examples that highlight just how convincing and manipulative these scams can be. In one case, a man in his 30s transferred more than €36,000 to a woman he met online who claimed she needed help travelling to Ireland to be with him. In another, a woman in her 40s lost €26,300 after being persuaded to financially support a man she met on Facebook who said he was a doctor working in a war-torn country.
Romance fraudsters are highly skilled at what they do. They follow carefully prepared scripts designed to say exactly the right thing at the right time. According to a Garda spokesperson, their backgrounds often appear completely legitimate. Many claim to be widowed or divorced, with grown-up children and a desire for companionship rather than something overtly romantic at first.
They mirror their victim’s interests, values, and personal experiences, carefully crafting a connection that feels deeply personal. As the relationship progresses, expressions of affection and love often come quickly. As emotional attachment grows, the brain releases chemicals such as dopamine and oxytocin, creating a sense of euphoria similar to addiction. This can weaken rational thinking, making it harder for victims to recognize warning signs that might otherwise seem obvious.
Once that emotional bond is firmly established, the requests for money begin. Fraudsters may claim to be stranded abroad, facing urgent medical bills, dealing with frozen bank accounts, or missing out on a lucrative business opportunity. These stories are designed to create urgency and pressure, making the victim feel like the only person who can help.
While anyone can fall victim to a romance scam, older individuals, particularly those with financial stability or assets, are frequently targeted. Women over 50 have consistently been identified as a high-risk group, but younger people are increasingly being targeted as well, especially through dating apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge.
There are warning signs that can help identify a potential romance scam, including:
- A push to move conversations away from dating platforms to private messaging apps such as WhatsApp or direct text messages, where there is less monitoring.
- Repeatedly avoiding video calls or in-person meetings, often accompanied by excuses or the use of edited images or prerecorded footage.
- Inconsistent or changing stories about their job, location, background, or personal history
- Emotional manipulation, particularly when money is refused, including guilt-tripping, accusations of mistrust, or sudden anger.
If you believe you may have been targeted by a romance scam, or if your personal or financial information has been compromised, Gardaí strongly advise contacting your local Garda Station. All reports are treated with confidence.
Emotional support is also available for those affected. The Crime Victims Helpline provides free and confidential emotional support and can be reached on 116 006. For those who prefer text support, the helpline is also available at 085 133 7711.